I know. I know how bad that pun was. I’m going to let you in on a not-so-secret secret. I’m terrible at coming up with titles, and I recently decided to stop caring, and just write down the first thing that popped into my brain, which in this instance that monstrosity, unfortunately for you.
I subscribe to Martha Stewart because of course I do, and I’ve been carefully saving the December issue to read after Thanksgiving. In my opinion, the December issue is usually Martha’s best issue, and I like to read it to get into the Christmas spirit. This year I was especially inspired by the wreaths of Emily Thompson, and decided to try to create something similarly unstructured. Last year I got lazy and just tied a bunch of evergreen branches together with a strip of fabric, in possibly the worst door decoration anyone’s ever made, so I really wanted to try to make up for that this year. Plus, since then I’ve logged some hours making arrangements for my cousin’s rehearsal dinner, and helping my OTHER cousin put together her wedding flowers, so I’m basically an expert, right?
I went around my parents’ yard and stole a bunch of rosemary, some pretty leaves from a shrub of unknown origin, and some magnolia leaves. I found if you use enough wire, you can definitely bend branches into something approximating a circular, wreath like shape. I also stabbed myself on a long thorn, which hurt like a mother, but I think my pain allowed me to reach a higher level of greenery arranging, and scared the branches into co-operating.
Now, OBVIOUSLY it looks nothing near what Emily Thompson would create, but I’m pretty happy with how it turned out. It’s unstructured but it’s still a circle shape, it smells awesome thanks to all the rosemary, it was free, and every time I look at it I remember how I fought nature and won. It looks really good on the front door (where it belongs) but I feel weird posting pictures of the outside of my apartment on the internet.
So there you have it, the first craft of Christmukkah!